It’s a New Year , a New Start .. this time of year always feels like we can re-write things and make changes . However, and not to put a dampener on things straight away – it’s actually still all the same!
Yep, those relationships around you and the one with yourself – it doesn’t magically change just because we came into a new dawn. So, if you do want to create change then it’s all about reviewing and being clear on what needs changing and then stepping forward with intention and purpose.
This is a great time to review the relationships and see how they shape up.
For me relationships can be linked to my 4 concepts. Each of them is important in terms of whether the relationship is seen as something we want to work through or something we want to break away from.
1.Purpose
A relationship needs to have purpose. You need to understand how and why it fits into your world and how you fit into theirs. You understand what is going on and why this relationship meets needs. It fills a void in your life – it feels needed and you can see what it brings and what you both gain.
2.Mutuality
I call this a 2- way street. The relationship needs to have equal parts and all parties be equal. Giving and taking – having needs met. The needs may not be the same – one person may be a physical carer for another but that does not mean there is not equality between the people. That each person gains something and feels respected.
3. Authenticity.
A over- used word these days but that feeling when you are able to show up as yourself – with no mask – without second guessing your words or your actions. Free to express yourself within the relationship . .. you can also feel it when the other person does the same – or if you notice that they are not – this is a tension that creates a certain vibe.
4. Having 2 Feet In.
So often I see people that are already looking for the out. Perhaps they don’t want to fully commit so they just dip a toe in the water – or perhaps they are taking a foot out of the relationship already – saying the right things but waiting for the moment to leave. If a relationship is to be nurtured and healed and survive then both parties have to have 2 feet in.
You can apply these 4 concepts to a relationship externally – your partner for instance – but equally a friendship or family ship – you can review the relationship with yourself even with your job or your business.
Doing this ‘audit’ as such can help you identify which aspects of your relationships you want to work on or you are questioning and put you on the right track to make solid and sustainable and fulfilling changes.
My blogs here will help guide you throughout this year and you can also join my free facebook group
www.facebook.com/groups/lovingandlivingyourrelationships
You can also see videos from fabulous guests and my own insights on topics all relationship related via my You tube Channel
Sign up here for my brand new e-download – giving you my top tips and tools on how to navigate those tricky conversations. How to move from rupture into repair.
